Confession #2!

So, I think I have learned this lesson a million times but Life is Hard! For some reason I lived under the misconception that as you got older, wiser, started making your own decisions, things would suddenly become easier. How wrong was I!!

This week Jon-Michael headed off to the fun land of Youth Ministry. The land where it feels like I lose my husband at least 3 times a year. While he is playing with the kids and serving the Lord, I'm left behind this stupid desk and being a single mom. (Which I must give props to full time single moms b/c this is the hardest job ever!)

Not only am I lonely and sad for him to be away for a week but as the week drags on I'm becoming bitter and angry. I guess this makes Confession #2 of my blog. I know it sounds terrible and awful for a youth pastors wife to get bitter and angry but it is so hard to share your husband. It is so hard to be left behind, forgotten, while it feels like everyone else is off having fun. It's so hard to hear how much fun people are having while I'm at a job I hate. By the way, didn't we sign up for this together? Wasn't this a Calling on both of our lives? Yet I always get left out of the fun stuff.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe there is an Ultimate Purpose for why I get left behind. It's been a long week and it's almost over. I will pray through it and I know God's Strength will get me to the end. Pray with me for my heavy Heart!

Hard Choices

I am known to tell my youth to "Make good Choices", but what do you do when you can't explain the choices you make? When you want to make good choices but it seems like the choices you have are both wrong? It's hard to hear God, I mean actually listen to Him when there is a choice you have your mind set on and it seems like everyone else around you is making those choices for you. Does that mean it's God making the tough decisions for you by forcing you into something? Or is it you not being patient to hear His voice? I have no answer. I wish someone did!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year to All!
I am gladly welcoming the New year although 2009 brought many wonderful things to my life includign my amazing son, 2 nieces, and new church! I am ready for the change of pace and change of mind set. I can't wait to see my little Mason will be one in only a months time and I am so excited to watch him grow and try new things! He is amazing to watch as he explores the world. Our Youth group has brought so much happiness to my life this year and I am so happy to be building so awesome relationships with these kids! I hope that 2010 will just make them that much stronger! This year I am praying for more Faith, a more positive attitude, and a clear vision of what God wants me to be doing in my life! Hope you all start the year with a great attitude!